A Man’s World Vs. A Woman’s World
A man sees the world as an individual in a hierarchical social order where he is either one above or one down. it’s about status, it’s about negotiations and attempts to make himself the upper hand. it’s a contest, a struggle to preserve his independence.
Man and woman are two different beings. Even while living under the same roof and sleeping on the same bed, conversation between a man and a woman is like cross cultural communication. From a very young age girls play with their best friends or stay in small close knit groups and use language to seek information and reinforce intimacy, whereas boys use language to protect their independence. Like I said it’s a different world and a different way of thinking. Men like authority in their relationship where as women crave security and intimacy. In this article, I want to point out simple yet very powerful reasoning as to why men act the way they do and how we differ from woman in our mentality.
As we all know men and women live in two different worlds. No matter how much we talk about equal rights the truth is society still sees a man as the main provider. Even in a society where a household can’t sustain with just one person’s income, a man being above the woman still prevails. Sad but true!
A Man’s World
When a man engages in a conversation he engages in way he was taught to, as an individual in a hierarchical social order where he is one up or one down. When you see a man disagreeing with his wife , he is trying to achieve and maintain the upper hand and protect himself from being the under dog. An argument or a simple conversation for a man is a contest, a struggle to preserve independence and avoid failure.
A Woman’s World
Women, on the other hand see the world as a network of connections. They look at the world as an individual who is a part of network of connections. A conversation for a woman is negotiation for closeness not be the upper hand. Life to a woman is a community where they try to preserve intimacy and avoid isolation.
What do you think? Am I right? Think men, think! And if you are a woman throw some suggestion and views and opinion at me. It’s always better to see how the world looks from your side and learn more.
15 Comments
July 5th, 2008 at 12:58 am
I’m a woman & I prefer isolation to “closeness.” When my husband disagrees with me, it’s because he sees an issue in a different way, not because he’s trying to get some kind of upper hand. So much for your theory…
July 5th, 2008 at 3:20 am
Lana : Lucky you! You are lucky to have a husband who doesn’t think that way. But do remember I am not talking about individuals, I am talking about men in general.
July 5th, 2008 at 4:31 pm
I actually think women are more attune to social status than men. While we definitely prefer more clearly structured hierarchical relationships, women are as much - if not more - concerned with with their standing amongst their peers.
July 5th, 2008 at 9:16 pm
I disagree with your premises. I think you are stereotyping and my partner and I don’t fit in to what you say at all.
July 5th, 2008 at 9:21 pm
I don’t really agree with this. I mean, it’s too sweeping of a statement to say “men are like this” and “women are like that”. I know lots of women who sound like the men you described and vice versa.
Deal with people on an individual basis. I think that works best. It’s easy to generalize, but that can get you into trouble I think…you can assume things that just aren’t there.
July 5th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
James, Timethief, DrowseyMonkey : I wan’t trying to sound stereotypical as I don’t believe in the standards society has set for men and women to live by and follow. It was just a thought, an opinion. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your views and opinion as well. That’s this blog is all about, sharing and exchanging views.
July 6th, 2008 at 5:19 am
You make men sound like horrible people! I agree that women crave security and intimacy. We also use communication for closeness. I don’t really think that you can say that men are always trying to get the upper hand….maybe in some cases, but not in ALL relationships.
July 6th, 2008 at 9:51 am
Caron : I have no intention of making men sound horrible. I am a man myself. The only reason for this article was to generalize the nature of men in general. Of course we are all different and to tell you the truth I don’t fit in the category set forward in this article as well. I just wanted to generalize how men and women think differently. Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to share your views.
July 6th, 2008 at 6:52 pm
I think women are the ones attracted to authority. In the movies the guys with power and authority get the chicks. About two years ago I relocated from a rural community to a small city to work for a large company. I was amazed at the percentage of good looking women there were and they all were hitched to guys who had authority and power. And these guys weren’t good looking either. They had authority going for them.
July 8th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Thanks for your site Mr. McCarty. Having a thoughful, civilized forum for men to discuss our subjective impressions on being men is something many of us can appreciate in these days of gender ambiguity and role uncertainty. Here’s to hoping that your message boards remain free of ego and one-upmanship. As for this thread, I don’t completely agree with the general point that began it, but it sure is hard to have a discussion unless we start somewhere. . .
July 10th, 2008 at 3:58 am
Women are determined in a material world, mwn are dstined to live in a Real world and are certainly more emotioinal than women internally.
July 10th, 2008 at 9:07 am
“An argument or a simple conversation for a man is a contest, a struggle to preserve independence and avoid failure.” I don’t really think all the men are like this. However, if they have 100% confident on one thing, they will ignore what other people say.
July 14th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
To previous commenters: why must people cry foul if any observation is made? Enough of our p.c. world–there exists certain commonalities among the genders, races, etc. They may be “stereotypes, but they exist for a reason.
It has been my experience with alpha-type males that they are very much about maintaining the upper hand. Omega males do not have as much of a problem with equal interaction with women, but I still see it in them, too. Though the critical, power-retaining remarks tend to be more underhanded and back-handed, and laughed off if identified.
I have a much easier time talking with my female friends because we are not invested in maintaining a hierarchy. One is smarter, one prettier, one more artistic–we see it, and accept it. We understand the need for community in a sometimes antagonistic world.
Alpha males must “win” the argument, or totally disinterest themselves. I find they do well with more masculine women/lesbians, because they accept them as equals, perhaps.
I do not know why such men must maintain the upper hand. Do they disparage women as their inferiors? Are they just playing a rough-and-tumble “boys game” of competition, but girls don’t know how to play and get their feelings hurt?
September 27th, 2008 at 8:48 pm
YIKES! haha i am writing a paper on gender differences for a college class, and man seeing all of these different views of people drive me crazy!
ALL IN ALL:
my opinion is that men and women generally have the same ideas; however, deal with each gender as individuals. its bad to view people as allll women are like this, allll men think like this, because everyone thinks differently.
i am a women obviously and i don’t fit the stereotypes of women. i don’t think many women fit the stereotypes of women haha.
im not emotional all the time
im not offended easily
im not argumentative
im easy going and open minded.
not all men and women are the same. everyone has their own thoughts and character.
DEAL WITH PEOPLE ON AN INDIVIDUAL LEVEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok thank you goodbye.
November 12th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
jlh3p0bgh4f0zeyd
Say Something! Leave A Comment!